Fearless

always put yourself on the steepest learning curve

I had coffee yesterday with Rebecca - a Director of Development from my university. For reasons too mundane to discuss in this post, I end up talking with someone from the university staff every few years about what I’m doing, what my old professors are up to, etc.

Inevitably, the conversation turns to my thoughts and opinions on college education. I think a lot of students (and universities) tie the degree with a job too closely. I don’t believe (or want) a university to be a vocational school. It should be a place where you can explore, debate, and seek knowledge. College - especially graduate school, is where I learned to love learning, and where I learned how to learn. Developing skills is one thing - developing an ability and passion to always try to learn new things is a completely different level.

Trivia

For those who don’t know, I studied music. I double majored in music education and music composition (which means I wrote a lot of music for middle schoolers to play), and after four years of teaching, I bought a computer, and used it to help me write a symphony while I got a masters in music composition.

In graduate school, I took a course on methods of musical research that I will never forget. Every Wednesday, Dr. Snedeker would pass out a list of questions that he called “Trivial Pursuits” (this was 1992, and the Trivial Pursuit board game was popular). The questions involved using techniques we learned in class - combined with pure persistence to answer a set of questions. When we found the answer, we notated where we found it in whichever style of attribution we were covering that week. Some examples were:

• Whose death was “bewailed” in Thomas Campion’s Songs of mourning in 1613? Where in this country will you find a complete copy?

• Who made two snare drums dated 1839 and 1841 now owned by the New York Historical Society?

• In what book will you find biographical notes on 53 song composers of India?

• Who first decided that A should be 440 vibrations per second?

• (and, my favorite…) What does “Gabriel” have between his teeth?

We were assured that the answers could be found in the library. Every week, I dedicated my Saturday to these Trivial Pursuits. I would arrive at the library when it opened at 9:00am, and usually wrap up by the time they kicked me out at 8:00pm. Finding the answers was sometimes straightforward, but often relied on scouring multiple biblographies and browsing dozens of books. Sometimes, even when we thought an answer should be straightforward, the book that I “knew” must contain the answer had been carefully moved over a few stacks by my sneaky professor - but there were always just enough clues to dig and find the answers.

The awesome thing is, that after 10 hours of scouring books in a massive library I wasn’t tired or frustrated - I was exhilarated. I was pumped and excited. I felt victorious and actually looked forward to the questions of the following week. Accomplishing difficult tasks is motivating. Years (decades) later, when I first read Drive by Dan Pink, he confirmed that knowledge workers are motivated by progress. When we accomplish things, we want to do more.

Learning Curves

Somewhere in the middle of my time at Microsoft, I was on a quest to figure out what I wanted to do - where I wanted to grow. I talked to a bunch of people who were higher levels than me to figure out what they did, and see if they had any advice for me. Jim Allchin, who was a VP in Windows at the time told me something that I’ve never forgotten.

Always put yourself on the steepest learning curve

All of the times in my life where I’ve grown the most have been the times where I was (slightly?) overwhelmed with the challenge, and was afraid it would finally be the time where everyone figured out that I didn’t actually know what I was doing.

There was a time post-windows 98 where I was working with a senior windows veteran on fixing the debug build of windows. It would barely build, and was nowhere near booting. We fixed a few issues, talked a bit, and then he retired. Rather than pair me with someone else, our leadership, with full confidence, told me that I should just do it by myself. The next few weeks felt very much like Dr. Snedeker’s Trivial Pursuits. I’d figure out how something worked in one place so I could hopefully find a clue somewhere else. Then, it worked - well, it booted to a desktop at least (a few months later, we could play network direct x games on debug windows). As with the long days in the library, it was exciting and motivating. I survived a steep learning curve.

Impostors

In my conversation with Rebecca we talked a lot about learning and taking on hard challenges. She mentioned Impostor Syndrome - that feeling many of us have where we don’t think we are actually capable of doing what we’re expected to do. She said something that I don’t think I’ve ever thought that much about, but made sense. She said,

These days, I just accept that I’m not going to feel like I’m qualified to do the things I’m asked to do, but I’m going to do them anyway. Feeling like an impostor is my default mode.

There are two vastly different ways of interpreting this quote out of context. The first is that it’s from a person with a lack of confidence in almost everything they do (yet they get it done), and the second (which is accurate in this case) is from a person who is comfortable being on a steep learning curve.

Comfortable being Uncomfortable

Maybe putting yourself on a steep learning curve just means being comfortable being uncomfortable. Forbes says that that’s a key to your success. In a Think Fast, Talk Smart podcast with Christian Wheeler, he discusses How to Get Comfortable with Being Uncomfortable - which really comes down to taking on things even if we know we could fail - or even probably fail. Remember, making mistakes is one of the best ways we have of learning, so putting ourselves in a place where we can mess up is a good thing.

I once played in a cover band that was invited to play some windows team event. Jim Allchin - who is definitely a respectable guitar player - asked if he could sit in with us on a few songs. Two minutes into a cover of Cocaine, he took a solo…and played in the wrong key. It took him …a while to adjust, but it was ok. He made a mistake, and then quickly learned that cover bands often will play songs in a different key than the original to accommodate the range of their singers.

The Next Curve

This may sound silly to some. I’ve been in tech for 30 years now, and some may think that I’ve probably learned it all (or enough) by now. But as I sit on my couch (yes, with the dog) and type this, I’m almost bubbly with excitement thinking about all of the new things I may get to learn this year (and wondering what kinds of mistakes I’ll make along the way).

If I’m lucky, I’ll find something that’s probably too hard for me to actually do. If I’m really lucky, I’ll get to try anyway.

If you’re curious, Gabriel had a drumstick between his teeth.